Friday, 7 September 2007

Complete outrage

We had a visit from the police at 10.30 last night. Just as I had made my way up to bed in my fleecy blue pyjama's that I use for lounging in. I peeped out of the window to see the panda car, now normally when one gets a visit from the police at 10.30 in the evening one can only assume that someone has had an accident, not us, we are on very friendly terms with the police and have been for the last 9 months since 2 officers first appeared at our door on 8th January 2007. Having given a very small chap at the door, I made my way down stairs to be greeted by my usual friendly PC and a colleague, he apologised for calling so late (night shift) and I excused my attire!

The hubby appeared from the living room wondering what I was doing. The 2 already stout PC's, appearing larger with their stab proof vests, batons, CS2 gas, radios and all the rest of the falderal, had to squeeze passed the clothes horse in the hall to make their way to the living room, hardly needing an invitation they've been here so often. They came with disappointing news, no proof, they said, so there it is 9 months of investigation and with 2 words it's over.

I will try and make this brief as I'm not sure I can go over it all again, I am fed up listening to myself> It all started in December 2006 the few days between Christmas and New Year, the hubby's boss called him to say his head office had received an anonymous phone call, from a lady, to say he (the hubby - not the boss) had a criminal record and he should be watched. No concerns, he had just left a company to go and work for an agency, with better hours and better pay, just a prank, sour grapes, we thought. Then in early January I went to cash line, I was refused money, I called my husband, he tried, he too was refused money. We went to the branch, they confirmed I had reported the cards stolen, the cards were reordered and arrived the next day. Strange, we thought. I then started received text messages of an 'adult' nature and got an email thanking me for joining Strange, the hubby thought! Still we are unconcerned, oblivious, just a coincidence. That was until the 8th January when we arrived home from swimming lessons, drove into the drive and were closed in by 2 young speeding officers in a panda car, who leapt out of the car. It was like a scene from The Bill. One officer went one way round our car, the other went the other way, while we stood there looking at them, then at each other. Come in, we said. I knew nobody had died, they didn't put their hats on.

They seemed to think we would know why they were at our door, they asked me to leave, my husband told me to stay. They had come to give him a warning, he had been threatening to petrol bomb a pub in the next village. They had received substantial information to support this. We realised at this point something was not right. We went to see the Sergeant at the police station to get further information, an anonymous phone call (made by a female) had been received by the pub, who's manageress had then quite rightly gone to the police, he confirmed they had to check this out and that they would be keeping an eye on my husband. I was ill, there had been a fight in the pub in September, my husband had gone for the police and was being called as a witness with our friend. The hubby was on night shift and I had visions of some mad nutter breaking into the house during the night to harm us. The police said they would give our house 'special attention.' I didn't sleep for nights. There was then a further phone call to hubby's work and our friend's work who also received an anonymous call, by a female, to say he was bringing the fire service into disrepute by brawling outside a pub. It had to be something to do with the pub, there was no other explanation. We called the Sergeant, he then sent our friendly PC to visit and a formal investigation was opened.

We had to go through the whole thing, dates, times - I forgot to mention all the hang up phone calls we were receiving during the night, all withheld numbers. had all my details, anybody could get that information, my business cards contained most of the information, but when I went to cancel the subscription, I requested the password be sent to me via email and discovered the password was my son's name. This made me shudder, I was a wreck, locking doors, asking people to give me 2 rings and then recall before I would answer the phone. We couldn't work it out, if it was to do with the brawl, my husband was not a local man, nobody would know him, never mind have all our details including my sons name. It had to be something else. 'Who has your bank details?' was the question that triggered it, the only people who had access to that information were the people that we had given cheques to for Christmas, two family members, one we would eliminate straight away, a nephew, who's girlfriend was English and it had been established the caller was a Scottish lady and the other the hubby's brother who is married to a lady with 4 children and we had given 2 of these children cheques for Christmas. An investigation was opened on this assumption, my sister-in-law was a suspect!

I am grateful we chose to take this further as 2 days later I received a call from social services looking to speak to me, immediately I asked if this was to do with an anonymous female caller, yes, was the response. I will not go into this any further as it is too upsetting, however, I immediately informed the lady of the situation with the police and I had to go over it all again, times, dates etc. before she would discuss the matter. Social services had received their call 2 weeks earlier and had spent that time investigating our family, checking criminal records, speaking to the head master at the school. I cried buckets all over the lady. I had finally broken down. I pulled myself together, made an appointment to see the headmaster, filled the hubby in and called the police to update them.

You may wonder why a sister-in-law would have reason to do this, and apart from the fact she obviously has serious psychological problems, we had been friends, worked together and then parted company. I became uncomfortable with her ability to tell lies with no conscience, I am the most honest person you would meet and I don't like lies, people who lie always get caught out. There was no fall out, no exchange of words, I just decided I would take no more to do with her. End of. She clearly understood as we just said hello in the passing thereafter. The night before her children were due to be christened (they were older so they could make their holy communion) she called, a year since we had last spoken, to say it was a small do and therefore the whole family were not invited. This resulted from a text message sent by the hubby to his brother to see what time the service was at, as we would go for his brother. It was a civil call and I thought it most decent of her to call - how stupid am I. A moment later she called back, demanding to know why we would want to go, that her and I had had this falling out blah, blah, BLAH. She tore shreds off me, I was to stay away from her and her children. Afterwards I cried and then I thought 'I should have said this, I should have said that' the hubby called his brother, the godfather of our son, he said ignore her! We never spoke again. She then told everyone in the family (6 sisters and 2 brothers the hubby has) that we had stopped the cheques we gave the kids for Christmas, she filled their heads with loads of nonsense, we were oblivious. That was until she was taken in for questioning, the brother threatened suicide and we had several family members on shouting about the state we had got them in. At this point we discovered 'she' had been passing small comments for months, said we had keyed their car.

We filled my mother-in-law in on all the goings on as by this time we had a diary, she then revealed all the things she had been told. The family tension was terrible and I was so upset to be accused of things we didn't do, surely the family knew me well enough, we've been married for 11 years and together for 16, never mind me, their own flesh and blood.

The police did get a mobile number for the call made to the fire brigade and would you believe it it was the sister-in-laws mobile. There was hope, hope of a charge under the 'malicious calls act' they requested the calls from the mobile phone company to confirm she had made the calls and we have waited and waited, we have had lawyers letters confirming we must stay away from them. We did see our lawyer but she suggested not wasting our money replying. They have recently moved, as they only lived a mile long the road, the brother keeps saying he is frightened of my husband, that is a laugh, he may be grumpy, but he's not violent. So last night was the night, the phone company only keep the calls for a short period of time and they are no longer available so it stands, no proof, no charge.

The friendly PC confirmed he knew she had done it, we know she's done it, but they have no proof, she has gotten away with it. We are unclear on the intension, was it to damage our relationship, our work lives, have our children removed or just generally wreck our whole world. But we are stonger, together and united we have stood through the lows and I'm am a great believer in what goes around, comes around.

I'm gutted, there is no closure........


dgibbs said...

Wow, just unbelievable. Stay strong and don't let her get the best of you.

Self employed mum said...

Dgibbs - thanks for dropping in, I appreciate your support, if we can get through this we can get through anything.

Manic Mother Of Five said...

OH MY GOD. What you must have been through. Have a very strained relationship with my outlaws so have an idea of what it must have been like....... Keep hanging in, maintain your dignity and I am confident she will get hers. I am a great believer in karma.......

Self employed mum said...

MMOF nice to see you, I believe in karma, what goes around comes around. I just wish it would come a bit quicker!